Me: Okay, let's go for a walk.
B: AWESOME I love walks.
Me: It might not be super lengthy because I haven't replaced my coat that was stolen last winter and it's cold as balls out there.
B: Like, tennis balls?
Me: ...no. Let's go.
Outside
B: Man it's nice out! There's so many cool smells. I really need to smell this smell over here. I'm estimating that I'll need between four and six minutes to fully appreciate the aromas that have blended in this patch of leaves.
Me: B-b-b-b-b-buffy we n-n-n-n-need to keep moving.
B: No, no we don't, first smells, then walk.
Me: I'm..... it's.... so cold.
B: Okay, four minutes. I'll make this sacrifice for you.
Me: I'm sorry, we're moving now.
B: What the hell, man. What. The. Hell.
Home
Me: I need to go to work so you have to go in your crate. I'm sorry.
B: That was the shittiest walk in existence.
Me: ... I know. I'll buy a coat on the way back from work. I'm sorry. I'll see you soon.
B: Fuck you.
Me: I love you. I'm leaving now.
B: Fuuuuckkk..... yoooouuuuu....
